There aren’t really a whole lot more ways that I can express how excited I get, but I feel like every time the excitement grows. First it was a Happy Dance. Then it was Holy Batman giddy girl excitement. Today I hugged people. I mean, I actually demanded my coworker hug me. For those of you who don’t know me well, I’m not really a hugger. There’s not really a ton about me that screams, “Hug me, I’m cuddly!” But today is the day this shit got real. I have (FINALLY) gotten final medical and dental clearance to serve in the Peace Corps.
Most of the time now, I am functioning as though I am going to move to Indonesia. I mean, I’m going to the doctor a billion times and giving notice to my work and moving out of my apartment. You know, planning and preparing, but there are very few moments where I actually believe it. It’s pretty rare that I can really imagine that in a mere 72 days I will be on my way to a whole new chapter. Rare, but not impossible. It happens sometimes, like today, where I think “Holy Hell, gaux. You’re actually moving to Indonesia for two years.” And I get excited. I mean, jaw dropping, butterflies in my stomach excited.
People keep looking at me askance with a puzzled look and remark in a quiet voice “You’re so brave!” To which my only response is to look at them with a similar quizzical face. I can’t really say I think of this journey as brave. Is it brave to take an opportunity when it’s presented to you? (I can’t say it was handed to me because I’ve worked like hell to get here.) Is it really all that brave to let the government pay for you to move to another country and then pay for you to live there and do the thing that makes you happy? Really guys? Really? I feel lucky and honored to be able to do it. I’m stoked that I get to be involved in something this awesome. But brave? Naw. Scared? Sometimes. I’m sure as I get closer I’ll develop an ulcer or something from worry. The packing, the moving, the bills, the anticipation. Worth it? Oh yeah.